A letter to my 20 year old self

I chose to write you a letter tonight from your 29 going on 30 year old self. Haha, I know you never thought 30 would be old, thank goodness you still feel the same. As 30 approaches, I am thinking back to you.....young, innocent and curious. Right about now, you are probably somewhat satisfied with life on the outside but something isn't quite right, is it? You don't need to get into details with me because I know you so well. I know some days you feel so off, you wonder what else life can offer. You wonder if you are being treated the way you deserve. You question your faith and your choices. I am happy to tell you that you will make it through this patch. It takes time to figure out which direction to go in and to let go of your expectations. Sometimes it is impossible to get what you want out of what you already have, do you understand? It is ok to give up on something when chasing it offers nothing but pain. Learn to let go. In the next few years, you will truly understand what that means and how it feels to move on. You will make a new world for yourself, and you won't look back. That being said, at some point you will meet a guy that cherishes you. He will support you, not so much with words, but by his actions. If you don't notice that attribute in the person you are with now, believe me.....he isn't THE one. Home is where the heart is. You will never forget that, you will also learn that Home is where you make it.....it's more about who you are with, then where you are living. Cherish the moments you feel comfort and safety. One day, you will enjoy sitting reclined in front of the fireplace enjoying your solitude and a cup of tea with your loved ones. Yes, you will love to stay home on the weekend nights, doesn't that sound relaxing and SO grown up? Life is going to be hard, by now, you have experienced a piece of that. More friends will pass, more hearts will break and more tragedy will strike. What little bits of faith you feel you have now, you will question in just a short time. Don't give up....ever, not even when your 30. There is a plan in place for you. Slowly, it will surface but believe me, it will keep you on your toes every bit of the way! I am happy to say that without a doubt, you are fulfilled when your 29. You are amazed and you are loved and YOU are grateful. So much to look forward to.